Friday, March 23, 2007

More than a game...

...yet, perhaps, still a game...albeit in a different league.

Whichever way, on a personal feelings note, the Bob Woolmer death is possibly the saddest story from the world of cricket after this one.

What is more sickening is that should India lose tonight, all attention will immediately move there and no one will stop to think beyond the immediate. Slander. Insults. Ad Revenues. Destruction.

...and then our pointless lives will immediately move on to the next....big game.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Brand New Day (aka Brand New Life)

So, as updates go, this one is the mother of them all – I am getting married! And as if the changes that this entails in itself (I believe you could be seeing each other for eons of time but it is still all…uhhh…brand new once you get married) were not enough already, there is the additional reorientation of 'new city' and 'new job' also thrown in!

The ‘new city’ part isn’t all that bad – for years…make that forever…I have wanted the slightest excuse to move out of Delhi (yeah, yeah, I could have done it without this reason to do it…but you try telling my mom that!) and now, it finally happens! So, am pretty glad about that side of things. It is so exciting to be able to discover a new city and its subtleties (and not-so-subtleties too!) and culture…even memorizing landmarks seems exciting right now! Of course, reality will sure begin to bite sometime soon…and is already with this city having a few tsk-tsk notes of its own already…they kill dogs here! I mean, who does that?!

The ‘new job’ bit gets a bit tricky – I have been working in my company for the last four and a half years or so…and so, have been quite out of touch of the whole look-for-job routine for a bit. Also, have never really liked very much the whole negotiations and interviews routine too much, so dammit! But then again, the fact that there is a change and (yeah, baby!) more money at the end of this road keeps me 'inspired' to go on.

Ah. And now for ‘new life’. This is a complete seesaw. There is the freedom to be and do which is so utterly blissful (not that my poor parents had me shackled or anything!) but the whole new responsibilities thing is SUCH a pain for a lazy bum like me! Grocery Bills. Food Bills. Cable Bills and even ensuring a regular supply of essentials such as cigarettes, food, water, milk, etcetera…etcetera…the brow sweats just thinking about them! Such is the bargain. Damn you, married people for not warning us about it though!

All in all - new is definitely better than same ol’ same ol’ and when the dust settles, and when visions of endless movie marathons and lazing and ordering in takes over?

Life begins to smile!*

*except for the killing dogs bit though…I wouldn’t mind if it were auto drivers instead though.

Monday, March 05, 2007

A hilarious forward

...I received on email. I believe this was written by Shivjeet Khullar, but am not too sure. If someone could confirm/indicate the source, it would be much appreciated!

A is for Awpheesh (as in Office). This is where the average Kolkakattan goes and spends a day hard(ly) at work. And if he works for the West Bengal Gawrment he will arrive at 10, wipe his forehead till 11, have a tea break at 12, throw around a few files at 12.30, break for lunch at 1, smoke an unfiltered cigarette at 2, break for tea at 3, sleep sitting down at 4 and go home at 4:30. It's a hard life!

B is for Bhision. For some reason many Bengalis don't have good bhision. In fact in Kolkata most people are wearing spectacles all the time.

C is for Chappell. Currently, this is the Bengali word for the Devil, for the worst form of evil. In the night mothers put their kids to sleep saying, "Na ghumaley Chappell eshey dhorey niye jabeö"

D is for Debashish or any other name starting with Deb-. By an ancient law every fourth Bengali Child has to be named Debashish. So you have a Debashish everywhere and trying to get creative they are also called Deb, Debu, Deba with variations like Debanik, Deboprotim, Debojyoti, etc. thrown in at times.

E is for Eeesh. This is a very common Bengali exclamation made famous by Aishwarya Rai in the movieDevdas. It is estimated that on an average a Bengali, especially Bengali women, use eeesh 10,089 times every year. Ei Morechhey is a close second to Eeesh.

F is for Feeesh. These are creatures that swim in rivers and seas and are a favourite food of the Bengalis. Despite the fact that a fish market has such strong smells, with one sniff a Bengali knows if a fish is all right. If not he will say 'eeesh what feeesh is theesh!'

G is for Good name. Every Bengali boy will have a good name like Debashish or Deboprotim and a pet name like Motka, Bhombol, Thobla, etc. While every Bengali girls will have pet names like Tia, Tuktuki, Mishti, Khuku, etc.

H is for Harmonium. This the Bengali equivalent of a rock guitar. Take four Bengalis and a Harmonium and you have the successors to The Bheatles!

I is for lleesh. This is a feeesh with 10,000 bones which would kill any ordinary person, but which the Bengalis eat with releeesh!

J is for Jhola. No self respecting Bengali is complete without his Jhola. It is a shapeless cloth bag where he keeps all his belongings and he fits an amazing number of things in. Even as you read this there are 2 million jholas bobbling around Kolkata- and they all look exactly the same! Note that 'Jhol' as in Maachher Jhol is a close second

K is for Kee Kaando! It used to be the favourite Bengali exclamation till eeesh took over because of Aishwarya Rai (now Kee Kando's agent is trying to hire Bipasha Basu).

L is for Lungi - the dress for all occasions. People in Kolkata manage to play football and cricket wearing it not to mention the daily trip in the morning to the local bajaar. Now there is talk of a lungi expedition to Mt. Everest.

M is for Minibus. These are dangerous half buses whose antics would effortlessly frighten the living daylights out of all James Bond stuntmen as well as Formula 1 race car drivers.

N is for Nangto. This is the Bengali word for Naked. It is the most interesting naked word in any language!

O is for Oil. The Bengalis believe that a touch of mustard oil will cure anything from cold (oil in the nose), to earache (oil in the ear), to cough (oil on the throat) to piles (oil you know where!)

P is for Phootball. This is always a phavourite phassion of the Kolkattan. Every Bengali is born an expert in this game. The two biggest clubs there are Mohunbagan and East Bengal and when they play, the city comes to a stop.

Q is for Queen. This really has nothing to do with the Bengalis or Kolkata, but it's the only Q word I could think of at this moment. There's also Quilt but they never use them in Kolkata.

R is for Robi Thakur. Many many years ago Rabindranath Tagore got the Nobel Prize. This has given the right to all Bengalis no matter where they are to frame their acceptance speeches as if they were directly related to the great poet and walk with their head held high. This also gives Bengalis the birthright to look down at Delhi and Mumbai and of course 'all non-Bengawlees'! Note that 'Rawshogolla' comes a close second !

S is for Shourav. Now that they finally produced a genuine cricketer and a captain, Bengalis think that he should be allowed to play until he is 70 years old. Of course they will see to it that he stays in good form by doing a little bit of joggo and maanot.

T is for Trams. Hundred years later there are still trams in Kolkata. Of course if you are in a hurry it's faster to walk.

U is for Aambrela. When a Bengali baby is born they are handed one.

V is for Bhaayolence. Bengalis are the most non-violent violent people around. When an accident happens they will fold up their sleeves, shout and scream and curse and abuse, "hoto chhara - maar bolchhi but the last time someone actually hit someone was in 1979.

W is for Water. For three months of the year the city is underwater and every year for the last 200 years the authorities are taken by surprise by this!

X is for Xmas. It's very big in Kolkata, with Park Street fully lit up and all Bengalis agreeing that they must eat cake that day.

Y is for Yesshtaarday. Which is always better than today for a Bengali (see R for Robi Thakur).

Z is for Jebra, Joo, Jipper and Jylophone.